Occasionally a new [tag]client[/tag] of mine will sell one of my [tag]candidates[/tag] a “bill of goods”, meaning that they paint a lovely picture of the job that’s only hiding the hideous green monster that’s lays at the heart of the REAL position. So, three weeks go by and I get the “what in holy hell is going on here” call from said candidate. Then I have to go back to the client and try to have a conversation with them about “what in the holy hell is going on there”. Inevitably, the candidate ends up leaving, the client ends up trying to get their money back from me (nope) and I have two soured relationships in one single day.

Listen, I’m here to find people for hard-to-find positions. I understand you’re having a hard time finding people. If you weren’t you wouldn’t be willing to pay me a fee to find you someone. But, you have to be brutally honest about things with the candidate from the very beginning…and you have to be brutally honest with ME about the same. Don’t understand what I’m talking about? Well here:

I had an [tag]agency[/tag] neglect to tell me that their biggest client was up for sale. I placed the candidate with them and two weeks later the client was sold. The new owners decided to take everything in house and my candidate was laid off the next day. I had moved her from one side of the country to the other and there she sat jobless and plotting to kill me. Do you really think I want someone out there who wants to kill me? I’m already scared there are angry midgets in a room somewhere plotting an intricate end to my life. I don’t need my candidates jumping on the bandwagon!

I was able to find her another job thank God, but you have to realize the pain and anguish that this poor girl went through. All we had to do was delay her start date until the time of decision and we never would’ve gone through the mess in the first place. But, we didn’t…because my client kept NEEDED information from me.

If it’s a tough situation, then it’s just that, a tough situation. If the client is being sold, then the client’s being sold. If the job requires 75 hours a week…well, that’s just how it is. And, I can find you candidates, but I need to know the truth…the whole truth up front. Got me chuckles? Good! ‘Cause if it happens again, I’m bringing all those angry midgets to your office and they can bite your ankles pretty damn hard! (that one was for you Ames)

By the way, on the subject of pickles: I am a [tag]pickle enthusiast[/tag]. Ask anyone who knows me and they will tell you very quickly that I can down an entire jar of pickles in one night. Dill pickles are probably the tastiest things that I’ve ever put in my mouth. [tag]Dill pickles[/tag]! Sweet pickles are disgusting! Sweet pickles are the licorice jellybeans of salty snacks. They literally make me vomit a little in my mouth if I ever try and eat them. And I never intentionally try and eat them. It only happens because I see what I think is a delicious, tasty dill pickle and put it my mouth…because, why in God’s name would anyone have sweet pickles just laying around stinkin up the joint? Why!?! WHY?! I am starting a petition as we speak to have sweet pickles banned in the United States. I’ve already signed my name…how ‘bout you? Clausens forever baby!

“Soon you’ll find that what goes around comes around. And when the circle surrounds you, you’ll hate yourself too.”  ~Me